No Thanks, I Think I’ll Walk!

Liam Denzel


“The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” – Douglas Adams

I used to love flying, up until a few years ago on a flight from Honolulu to Sydney, where I thought I was going to die. I don’t mean that as a casual over exaggeration,  I really thought I was going to die. As the whole cabin was screaming, I sat there calmly panicking thinking, “So this is it, this is how it all goes down.Plane Explosion

Well lucky for you lot our pilot did a great job landing that plane in atrocious weather, and I’m still here. Unfortunately for me it means, I don’t enjoy the flight as much as I used to, but an hour in a plane to Melbourne sure beats 8 hours driving.

Which brings me to today’s movie reviews. Last night I locked myself in my room away from the world and watched two movies I generally stay away from, Disaster Movies. I won’t lie, disaster movies shit me to tears. Something catastrophic happens, people die en mass, hero battles their way through carnage saving lives to finally make it back to their loved ones. It’s the same thing over and over again and they bore me to tears. On that premise, I’m not sure why I watched these movies at all!

I’d say it had a lot to do with the two leads, Denzel and Liam. I’ll watch those two blokes in anything.
Flight Starring Denzel WashingtonFirst off I pressed play on Flight. The latest feature from Denzel Washington. Denzel plays Captain Whip Whitaker, an alcoholic, junkie commercial pilot. Probably not what you want to see on a pilot’s resume! Whip doesn’t mind a drink, but he’s a responsible pilot and knows he can’t fly drunk, so he sobers himself up with cocaine. Thanks Whip, you just made getting on a plane even harder!

On a flight during rough weather, Whip’s plane decides now is a good time to fall apart and only Whip’s amazing skills as a pilot saves most of the passengers on board. After making an amazing crash landing in a field during some pretty cool special effects, Whip finds himself in hospital being labelled a hero.

Denzel does another flawless job as a raging alcoholic, struggling with the disease and with the whole world calling him a hero, as he attempts to avoid the truth and stay out of jail.

While these movies aren’t usually my cup of tea, I sat through this one easily and I guess I can say I enjoyed it. Watch for a great cameo from John Goodman as Denzel’s drug dealer, as always that man is a legend.

The_Grey_Movie_Poster_LargeNext up I hit play on a movie I’ve been sitting on for a while, The Grey, starring Irish Action Man, Liam Neeson. Liam plays a bloke employed by a mining company to kill the local wolf population around the mining camp. Seems these wolves don’t mind the taste of human, so it’s not a good idea to try and pat them.

Well it’s time for the workers of the camp to head home for a break and all board a plane that also turns out to be doomed! Once again I get to watch a plane head straight toward the ground at a rapid rate of knots and burst in to flames. We only get a handful of survivors and of course half the survivors aren’t the best of friends. Everyone seems to have an attitude and not too many people want to listen to Liam, who not only knows a little bit about survival, but he also knows about the nasty ass dogs hiding out in the snow that don’t mind a bit of plane crash survivor.

It doesn’t take too long for them to find out about the evil that lurks though as the wolves are quick to attack.

This quickly became a standard, “we can’t stay here and must find a way out” type movie. With a standard cast of characters, the leader, the guys that have no idea what to do and are scared and eager to follow, one tough but gentle black guy and of course one bloke who knows everything and doesn’t want a part of the rest of them, but begrudgingly follows, being annoying the whole time.

As the wolves pick them off one by one, you wonder if anyone is going to make it at all.

Once again, I usually find these movies tough to watch, painful almost because I just want them to end. But this one was different, I won’t say I enjoyed it, but it wasn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen.

On a whole, both of these movies were OK. No doubt if you like disaster movies you’ll probably really enjoy these shows. Aside from my distaste for this kind of movie, I think both Liam and Denzel did great jobs.

I’m giving both movies 2 and a half Popcorns.

1 star1 starhalf star



Let me know what you think!